April Fools
by ILYmarissa
Summary: Who says jealousy is a bad thing? A plan formulated by two friends could change their lives forever! RicFic! PLEASE REVIEW! Rating just to be safe, noting hardcore at all.
1. Chapter 1

_**Now it is Spring Break and guess what? I AM SICK! So that is depressing. But I was lying in bed thinking about stuff to do and I was just like OMG I should write a new story. SO here is what I have come up with. It is exciting because I have double motivation. 1. I am watching Peter Pan and that is exciting. 2. Mommy is bringing me home ICE CREAM! That makes me excited!**_

_**Without any further ado here is my new story! be excited**_

"Rex, are you excited it is just you and me and the Ghostbusters tonight." I said to Rex, my pet hamster, when I walked in the door from a long day of work.

I'm Stephanie Plum former "bombshell bounty hunter" and now currently working at RangeMan enterprises. I love my new job. For one I haven't blown up a car since I started working here, and I also have a close relationship with my boss, one Ricardo Carlos Manoso. Ranger to most people.

Ranger is a badass bounty hunter, a business man, and a Cuban sex god. He and I have a different kind of Relationship. I have slept with him once a long time ago and it was an experience I shall never forget. Mostly because when I woke up in the morning he sent me back to my ex boyfriend Joe Morelli.

Joe is a vice cop and has been in my life since I was six, when he first started looking up my skirt. He has been my on and off boyfriend for over 4 years now, and we get along pretty well. The only time we fight is when he is telling me to quit my job and get started on the next generation of Morelli's.

Currently Morelli and I are an item. We have been for the past 4 months and it has been pleasant. I can't help but to feel that we are drifting apart.

Right as I was getting ready to order the pizza for Rex and my movie night my phone rings.

"Yo" I'm starting to turn into Ranger. I own mostly black clothes and now I answer the phone yo. Oh boy.

"Cupcake, are you busy?" Joe. He never did know how to call at a decent time. Like the time he called me right as I was about to slap the cuffs on an FTA. That caused me about a mile sprint down the street, and a coat full of rotten eggs.

"Rex and I were just getting ready to watch Ghostbusters. Why?"

"I really need to speak with you." He sounded sort of desperate.

"Okay when and where?" I asked. I was sort of sad that I didn't get to spend quality time with Rex. But he would get over it, if I gave him a grape or two.

"Pino's in a half hour, and thanks Cupcake."

What could possibly be so important that he needed to see me now?

A half an hour later I pulled into Pino's in my new dodge 1500. Joe was already in the restaurant sitting at the table, his dark hair shining in the dark overhead lighting. Joe certainly was fine looking. He lived up to his title "Best ass in Trenton".

I walked up to the table and sat down next to him.

"Hey cupcake how was work?" Joe asked. Making small talk I'm sure.

"Good thanks. Joe what was so important that I had to miss Ghostbusters." I mean it is my favorite movie. I had been looking forward to seeing it all day.

Wait, something was seriously up. Joe didn't get out of his seat to pull the chair out for me, nor did he give me a kiss hello. What is going on here?

"Um Steph, there is something I need to talk to you about."

Oh god, please do not let this be the dreaded question. Please god!

"Steph? Are you listening?"

"Oh right yes." Please please please.

"We have been going out for a long time. We have ahd loads of greaet times. All the late night monopoly games, and dinner at your family's house. It has been great"

Has been? What is he saying? Why is he using the past tense? I don't think he is going to propose to me.

"….but it just seems to me that we are drifting apart. Stephanie I love you more than you will ever know, but you and I just don't seem to fit the husband and wife profile."

He is breaking up with me. This is a formal breakup. We have never done this before. Normally he will say something stupid and I will storm up to his room, pack my laundry baskets and run back to my apartment. Then about a month later he is back in m bed. He has never broken up with me before.

"It isn't like this is goodbye forever. I just think that we should be friends. Like we were a long time ago."

"Joe are you breaking up with me?" Oddly enough I completely understood where he was coming from. I knew deep down in my heart that Joe and I were never going to get married. It would be selfish of me to just keep his as a forever boyfriend.

"Stephanie, I'm sorry, its just that, someday I want kids. I want a family with a wife that stays home and has a warm meal waiting for me when I get home. I have tried to make you into that, but as we both know. That didn't go over to well."

He was right. I want kids someday, but that someday is far off. I don't ever want to be a burg style housewife. And he was right the one time he tried that ended in the biggest fight we have ever had.

There was a long silence, what do I say to him? Thanks Joe for breaking up with me?

"Joe, I love you very much. But I think you are absolutely right. There is no way that I would ever marry you. And It would be completely selfish for me to hog you in your prime. So in a way, what I am trying to say is thank you. I have loved every bit of time that we have had together, and I'm sure we will have more great time, just as friends." I said tears welling in my eyes.

I was going to miss all those late nights and "celebrations" over nothing. I was going to miss Joe in general. He is a great man, kind and loving, just not the right man for me.

"Cupcake, thank you for understanding." He said getting up pulling me into a tight bear hug.

We sat there talking as friends all through our meal. After I had eaten my way through 4 slices of pizza and a cannoli, it was time to leave.

"Ranger is a good man Steph; you should give him a chance." Joe said as I was rising from my seat.

I plopped back down. Ranger has always been a strong dividing factor between Joe and I.

"I would give him a chance Joe, but he doesn't want me." I said tears forming in my eyes again. Good thing I wore waterproof mascara.

"I doubt that is true." He said softly as he scooted his chair closer to mine. "Who wouldn't want to be with you? Your beautiful, funny, smart, and damn lucky."

"You don't want to be with me Joe, neither does Ranger. I spent one night with his a while ago and you know what he did, he said I don't do relationships. He sent me back to you. He doesn't want me Joe." I gush, not realizing what I was saying before it came out.

I could tell he was taking a minute to either process this or cool off.

"You slept with him?" I knew this was going to happen.

"It was a long time ago Joe. We were in an off again stage and I don't know it just happened." I said not daring to look in my face.

"Now I would get really mad here if we were still dating, but seeing as how we are not it is not such a big deal." He said rubbing my back in soft circles.

"Stephanie, you would have to be crazy to think that Ranger doesn't want you. Just the way he looks at you the whole world can tell it. I think all Ranger needs is a push in the right direction. And I think I know exactly how to do it!" Joe said with a smile on his face.

**_There how do you like it? I don't know. If you hate it please tell me and I will stop writing! But I have a strict 10 reviews rule, so if you want me to continue please review!_**


	2. Chapter 2

_**Well I got my 10 reviews so you know what that means………more story! Okay I apologize to the people who hate my 10 reviews policy, but I just feel that if people don't like my story, I shouldn't waste my time writing it. But don't fret I got 10 reviews for this story so here we go! Oh right and I always seem to forget but I'm sure y'all know that I don't own any of these characters. **_

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"Stephanie, you would have to be crazy to think that Ranger doesn't want you. Just the way he looks at you the whole world can tell it. I think all Ranger needs is a push in the right direction. And I think I know exactly how to do it!" Joe said with a smile on his face.

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What is he going on about? Joe was never happy when I was anywhere near Ranger. Why has his mind changed so? And how does he honestly expect to change rangers mind?

"A push? What kind of push?"

"Well we are going to open Rangers eyes and show him that if he doesn't make a move quickly that someone else could steal you first."

"And just how are we going to do that?"

Then Joe got down on his hands and knees and grabbed the straw wrapper from the table. "Stephanie Michelle Plum will you marry me?" and he winked.

He wants us to pretend that we are married. That is going to get Ranger's attention. I think he is crazy.

"No cupcake not crazy, just smart." Oopsies guess I said that out loud.

"Joe I don't understand how is this going to get Ranger to realize that I want him for more than an occasional bed buddy?"

"Steph, if there is one thing everyone knows about men is that they like to challenge others. And when another man takes away what they think should be theirs they will put up a fight for it."

"Let me see if I understand this now. You and I are going to pretend to be engaged to make Ranger jealous?"

Joe just nodded his head. Well it doesn't sound like such a terrible plan, but what if Ranger is happy for us and then backs away. Will I risk losing him forever? I couldn't bear it. But on the other hand if this does work, then Ranger and I will be together. Is that a risk I am willing to take?

"Joseph I will marry you" and I winked at him.

"Now here is the plan, we act as if we are married. We will spend a lot of time in public places acting like we are madly in love. I was thinking that there are a few key people that we will need to get in on this plan."

I knew exactly who he was talking about, the two biggest blabber mouths in the entire state Lula and Connie.

After hammering out a few more details. Like the fact that this wasn't some plot to get me into bed or anything, and that we would not be sleeping anywhere close together, and what to tell my mother. We walked out of Pino's acting like a newly engaged couple.

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The next morning I spent over an hour on my makeup to give myself that natural glow of being completely and utterly happy.

I pranced into work 1 minute early and skipped over to my desk. Of course I got lots of weird stares. I don't think people normally skip inside the RangeMan building. Actually I think that they would get shot if they did skip.

I started typing up my first search with I felt a familiar presence behind me.

Oh boy here it comes the time of truth! Can I really pull it off?

"Ranger?"

"Babe?"

Oh god.

"Was there something you wanted? Or do you just want to stand there and stare at me?" Wait no bad. People who are engaged don't tease other men. Bad Stephanie.

"Are you free for lunch?"

"Sure, I have a donut date with Connie and Lula and 11 o'clock. How about 1 o'clock?"

"Donut date babe? Wait no I don't want to know. 1 it is." And he walked out of the room.

Wait wasn't there something I wanted to tell him? Damn my mind just seems to blank when he is around.

I finished what was in my box and headed over to the bonds office. I had to make a stop at the Tasty Pastry though to get a ½ dozen Boston crème's and ½ dozen chocolate glazed donuts.

When I pulled into the parking lot Lula was staring out of the window. I swear she can smell a donut a mile away. Today she was dressed as a lime. She has lime green highlights in her hair that was tied up into tight cornrows. She was wearing a lime green spandex jump suit and red platform heels.

"Whoa what is with the outfit?"

"Oh the jumpsuit? I figured that if I got a one piece there would be no lumps it would just suck all the fat in at one therefore making me look like a the skinny little black girl that I truly am."

I wasn't even going to try so I nodded.

I walked in and sat down the old musty couch and passed the donuts around.

"Okay guys, I have a plan that I am going to need your help with."

I proceeded to tell them about Joe and my plan.

"Damn Skippy that plans the shit. Connie and I are all over this. How about this I make a weird sort of bird call into your cell phone when Ranger is here, that was you and Joe can zoom over?"

"Right, sure we can do that. Or you could just make sure that when ever you see Ranger you ask him how I am doing with wedding plans. And document the look on his face."

"I got you covered girl" Lula said.

I left the other two donuts with Lula and walked out of the office.

I skipped back into the RangeMan building and right into the elevator. I hit the stop button in the elevator to check my makeup. I defiantly looked like I was glowing. So I pulled the stop button and Got out at the seventh floor.

Ranger opened the door right as I was about to ring the doorbell.

How the hell does he do that? Is that another one of the super powers that he possesses?

A smile started to play across his lips. "I have a camera that shows when people are coming babe."

I really need to learn how to control what I say out loud.

Ranger held open the door and I walked in.

"Guess what Ranger? I have great news."

He pushed me up against the door and brushed a light kiss against my lips, the kiss slowly deepened and I slipped off into a world of pleasure. His voice brought me back into this world.

"What's this good news babe?"

"I'm engaged"

_**There we are new chapter. Please tell me what you think. I will not update until I get 10 reviews so please tell me good or bad!**_


	3. Chapter 3

**_Right okay more story! Be excited. I don't own anyone. Yea so yea I don't know this story is kinda just pointless and fun. Well for me I don't know if you like it. Okay wow I am rambling. I had coffee and 2 diet cokes and it is midnight and I am wired and I have to be up in 5 hours and 45 minutes  oh well. Enjoy the chapter. Oh and by the way I am watching lord of the rings while I am writing this so hahaha who knows how bad this will turn out!_**

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He pushed me up against the door and brushed a light kiss against my lips, the kiss slowly deepened and I slipped off into a world of pleasure. His voice brought me back into this world.

"What's this good news babe?"

"I'm engaged"

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Ranger's face fell. He just stopped moving.

"Your engaged?" he repeated.

Oh boy I could tell this wouldn't be a good conversation.

"Uh, yea Joe proposed. Isn't that exciting?" This was hurting me deeply inside. I really didn't want to be telling Ranger all of this. It should be Ranger who I was getting married to. I really hope this works, because I couldn't bear loosing Ranger forever.

He just stared at me.

"Oh uh, yea good for you. I just remembered that I have some business that I need to take care of.

Then he just walked out of the room with a blank expression on his face.

I knew this was a bad idea. I am going to kill Joe. Ranger is just going to be pissed and not talk to me.

I walked out of Ranger's apartment, and went down to the garage. I was in no mood to work after that. On my way home I called Joe to tell him the problem.

"Joe?"

"Hey Steph, how's the plan going?"

"Well….um….I" I didn't know what to say.

"Uh oh, I will order the food and be at your place in 20 minutes" and he hung up.

What is with all the men in my life hanging up before me? Some day I will hang up first I swear.

I dove back home and walked up to my apartment. My second floor hallway smelt like meatball subs. When I turned the corner I saw Joe leaning against my door frame waiting.

"How long have you been here?" I asked him feeling bad that he had to wait.

"Only a few minutes" he said smoothly.

I just stood there staring at him. For the first time in a long time I looked at him under all the badass cover he puts on. Joe really did care about me. Not just to get me into be, but as a friend.

I just kept staring at him.

"Uh, Steph? May I come in now?" he asked obviously amused.

"Oh right sorry." I stuttered. I pulled out the key and we walked into my small apartment.

I walked over to the counter to get plates and napkins and Joe pulled out the food, and grabbed the beer out of the fridge. We had done this so many times that it had become common knowledge.

We sat down at the table and I just stared at my food. I knew Joe was waiting for me to talk, but I just couldn't bring myself to do it. I knew the second that I started talking about Ranger a damn would break and I would cry and cry and cry some more.

"Steph, what's wrong?" Joe asked.

I looked into Joe's eyes; he seemed to genuinely care about me. Not the, I am going to comfort you and then get you into bed either.

Then the damn broke and I started spilling about how this was a stupid plan and it was going to scare Ranger off. I cried about how he will never love me, and about how I will die without a husband or even a chance for children.

"Joe, I can't bear to loose him." I cried into Joe's shoulder.

"Stephanie, we haven't even started this whole plan yet. Look at it this way, if he didn't love you then why would he run out of the room when you told him? If he didn't love you he would have stayed and talked about wedding preparations and ideas, just like you would have done with friends. Steph, I know he loves you, everyone knows it. Trust me. We will make this work."

He was right. If he didn't care about me why would he freak when I told him that I was getting married?

"Thanks Joe. Now what is step one of the plan?" I said with an upbeat tone.

"Well I was thinking we need to get Connie and Lula over here to form a game plan. They will be here in a few minutes. I also called a few more of your friends that I am sure will be a great help in all of this." Joe said with a smile on his face.

"Who?" Just as I said that there was a knock on the door.

"Hey girlfriend, Lula's here." Lula said as she busted through the door.

"Hey Steph" Connie said as she walked in.

"Hey, supercop told me this was a party, where is the food? I need to keep up my strength." Lula said eagerly looking around for food.

Joe walked into the Kitchen and rummaged around for all the food he could find and put it on the living room table.

I walked into the kitchen and grabbed a beer and chugged it. I knew this was going to be a long night.

Then I heard another knock on the door. Joe walked over and opened it. It was Lester, Bobby, and Tank.

"Hey bombshell, nice party." Lester said as he gave me a huge bear hug.

"Bomber, we are here to solve your man problems" bobby said while attempting to do this complicated hand shake with me.

Tank came up and put his huge hand on my shoulder. "Ranger is an idiot when it comes to love. That is why we are here."

I glanced over at Lula, her mouth was hanging open and she was fanning herself.

"Okay here is the deal. We are trying to get Ranger attention on Stephanie so he gets jealous. That way when we tell him it was all a joke he will realize that Steph is not going to wait around for him. Now the problem, how are we going to do this?" Joe said to everyone.

I sat on the floor by the table drinking my beer silently.

"Jealousy is Lula's middle name, I got you covered girlfriend" Lula said clearly trying to impress Tank.

"Well then what is your plan, brains?" Connie said smugly.

Lula shot her the death glare. "Well Stephanie and Joe will go to a club, Steph looking Hot, and get into some heavy action on the dance floor."

"Uh Lula? How is that going to help me get Ranger?" I asked her.

"We would have to make sure that he was at the club and watching." Tank said.

"See I told you it was a good plan. Big boy here agrees with me don't ya." Lula said clearly beaming.

Tank looked slightly uncomfortable. Lester and Bobby were chuckling to themselves.

"Well Lester what is your big idea?" Tank said

"Okay I have this all worked out in my head. One night that we know Ranger is going to his parents for dinner, we make sure Bomber and Joe and there. Making Ranger all jealous therefore leading up to Ranger getting really pissed and making our lives hell, but ultimately there life long happiness." Lester said confidently.

We all just stopped and looked at Lester.

"No way in hell" I said

"Are you kidding?" Bobby yelled

"Damn Skippy" Lula said.

"That was your bright idea?" Tank asked.

"Uh yea, why are y'all looking at me like that? It was a good idea."

"Sorry Les, but one I won't do dinner with his parents unless we are….are uh yea."

"Nice one Lester" Bobby said.

"Fine, Bobby what is your Idea?" Lester asked trying to get himself out of the spot light.

"Well I was thinking that since we know where Ranger is going to be most of the time, we just make sure that you are there too. Like if Ranger is going to get an FTA at Pino's then you are both at Pino's making yourselves known and seen. Just being happy, and laughing and looking like you are in love. Make it so Ranger can't get you out of his head, because you will always be there." Bobby said.

I jumped up and gave Bobby a huge hug.

"Bobby, I love you. That could totally work."

"Connie and I could like call and have a code word for when Ranger was coming like the donuts and in the box. Yum donuts." Lula said.

"I like it" Tank said, he stole a glance at Lula, but it bounced right off her. She was clearly thinking about donuts.

Since we got all that worked out fairly quick we got on the couch and watched Ghostbusters.

When it was over I was in great spirits. Tank, Bobby, and Lester said there goodbyes and told me they would call tomorrow.

Joe was sitting on the couch watching the end of the Rangers game, and Connie was sitting next to him looking at her nails.

Lula pulled me into the kitchen.

"Girlfriend seeing as how I helped you so much, you would mind doing Lula a little favor?"

"I am not going out and getting donuts sorry."

"Damn I never though of that. No I want you to set me up with Big Boy. That mans the shit." Lula said.

I started laughing so hard that I was crying.

"You and Tank?" I said between breaths.

Connie came into the room and stared at me on the floor. "What did Lula say now?"

"She….she wants me to set her up with….with Tank." I said trying not to laugh.

Connie burst out laughing.

"What, is this one of those white girl things that I will never get?"

"No, I think they are laughing at your, cause you wanna go out with Tank" Joe said biting his cheeks so he wouldn't start laughing himself.

"You don't think I could get Tank?"

"We never said that" Connie and I yelled at the same time. We all knew that if she set her mind on something it would happen.

"Fine I will do what I can." I said.

Lula and Connie left a few minutes later.

It was just Joe and I left on the couch, just like old times. Almost to much like old times.

**_There DONE! Woot woot. Happy Easter! This is your present from me. I will try to update another story today, but this is a really long chapter for me so be excited! Still the 10 reviews policy. I know you hate is but oh well just review so you don't have to worry about it! And if there is anywhere you would like to see the story go, tell me. I would be happy to work with it!_**


	4. Chapter 4

_**Okay I am updating for y'all. This is pointless and dumb I swear but I really need help with ideas of where to go with it!!! So if anyone would like to help me I would love to listen!!**_

Lula and Connie left a few minutes later.

It was just Joe and I left on the couch, just like old times. Almost too much like old times.

We sat there watching Ghostbusters for about an hour, and for the first time in some 30 years Joe didn't even try to get me into bed with him. This was purely friendship, and I loved it.

I couldn't help but feel a twinge of excitement for the plans that were set tonight, and yet I was petrified that something would go wrong and someway somehow I would get hurt again.

When the movie ended I was entirely too comfy on the couch to move. My head was resting on Joe's lap feet curled under the blanket and I was all ready for bed. I was in the state half way between awake and asleep.

I must have fallen asleep there because when I woke up I was all nicely tucked into my bed, my clothes still on mind you, and Joe was no where to be seen.

I stumbled out of bed and into the bathroom to take a nice hot shower. I needed to relax, I could tell today was going to be psycho crazy. I don't even have a clue how to act like I am engaged; I completely blocked that part of my life from my mind.

When I immerged from the shower the smell of fresh coffee was billowing through the air.

"Good morning cupcake," Joe said with a smile.

"Where are the donuts? If you bought me coffee I know you bought me donuts too." I said eargly searching around.

"Who says I had to buy them for you."

"Were engaged remember, your supposed to do nice things like that for your 'Wife-to-be'."

I could defiantly see this whole engaged thing working out in my best interest.

From behind is back he pulled out a box filled with 6 Boston crèmes and 6 Chocolate sprinkled donuts.

"Its going to be a long day, so don't eat them all in one bite."

Uh oh, I didn't like where that was going. I am getting the feeling that the donuts where just to butter me up before he says something I don't want to hear.

"Well I am not real sure if you want to hear this or not, so the donuts were a safety precaution. I got Rangers schedule for the day."

Damn me for talking out loud.

"So here is the plan cupcake, you need to get all dolled up, look your very best, and then we are going to stop by the office. Ranger is having a meeting with Vinne, so we will be there when he comes out. I think that will be a good start."

I didn't even waste the breath to say that it was a bad idea. I just trooped off into the bathroom to try to tame my hair. I tried to hide the imperfections in my face with a freaking gallon of face powder, and I even painted my nails for the added touch. I figured it would be a bad idea if I wore my FMP, I mean I would prefer to not make this totally obvious.

I was lying on the bed trying to stuff myself into my jeans when Joe walked in.

"Maybe the donuts were a bad idea."

I just shot him the death glare and continued to try to zip them up.

"Damn, you can put yourself together nicely can't you?" Joe said giving me the once over.

"I try, it would be much more helpful if I could breathe though."

Joe and I trooped off to his car, and went off to the office. Along the way I called to give Lula the heads up that we were coming and somehow I managed to get talked into stopping at KFC to get her some wings. I don't know how she does that.

When Joe pulled the car up outside the office my heart fluttered when I saw Rangers Black turbo. This was really happening. What if I hurt him?

"Joe how am I going to be able to do this? I don't want to see him hurt. I love him, and all I am doing here is hurting him."

Joe pulled me into a hug.

"No cupcake, what you are doing is making him realize what he could have had. And then when we suddenly split he will realize just how much he really wants it."

That made sense. Kinda. But it is to late to back out of it now so I flung open the car door and in we pranced to the office.

"Why look who is here." Lula said exceptionally loudly. "It's the love birds. It's the bombshell and her beau, its true love, itsssss JOE AND STEPHANIE."

"Nope that wasn't one bit obvious" Connie said mockingly.

I handed Lula her chicken and sat down on Joe's lap on that musty old couch. We held hands and put on a pretty convincing show I do believe. I talked to Connie about skips while we were waiting for Ranger to come out.

Lula was sitting on the floor holding something to her ear and eating her chicken peacefully. An occasionally chuckle or "damn skippy" escaped her lips, but I thought better of asking.

"The donut is leaving the box" Lula said, staring directly at Joe and I. Instead of acting all lovely dovey we both just started cracking up. Everything wth Lula was about food.

I heard the door to Vinnie's office close and Ranger appeared staring right at me. My heart sank inside, but I repeated Joe's words in my mind.

"Hey Ranger." I smiled, and waved with my hand attached to Joe's.

He just stared at me for a moment, the sadness was obvious in his eyes.

"Joe may I speak to you outside please?" He said. His voice was light, but dangerious.

_**Okay I don't know. I have no idea where to go!! HELP!! But this was pointless but here you go. **_


	5. Chapter 5

Lula and Connie left a few minutes later

_**Alrighty then. Here I go with yet ANOTHER update. Yeah I am that awesome. I do want to say thank you to two awesome people for their reviews and suggestions: **_**Peko650**_** and **_**Bourikette.**_** Well then here we go. I do now own anyone in this.  
**_

"_Hey Ranger." I smiled, and waved with my hand attached to Joe's._

_He just stared at me for a moment; the sadness was obvious in his eyes._

"_Joe may I speak to you outside please?" He said. His voice was light, but dangerous._

"FIGHT….lets get the video camera from Vinne's filing cabinet," Lula hollered. "I have not seen a good fight in ages, plus maybe if we are lucky they will take their shirts off."

"You could not pay me to touch that camera." Connie said.

"Ranger is not going to beat Joe up." At least I hoped not.

"Humph."

Connie, Lula, and I stood with out faces pressed up against the glass watching the action. Ranger was blank faced as usual, but talking fast. Joe was nodding along jaw clenched.

"What do you think Ranger is telling him?" Connie asked.

"You best step away from my woman before I sit on you." Lula said.

"Yes because Ranger just sits on people so often." Connie replied.

We watched as the argument continued. The men were slowly getting more and more aggressive. Joe's Italian temper started to flair but it was no match for the batman.

"This is getting intense, anybody have any popcorn? Nothing goes better with hot men in a fight than popcorn, except maybe popcorn and hot men fighting without shirts on."

Connie and I just rolled our eyes and watched as Ranger swiftly got into his Turbo and motored out of the parking lot.

Joe came walking back in with a bit of a smile on his face.

"I think he won that one." Joe admitted.

"What did he say?"

"Nothing really."

"I saw his mouth move, he must have said something."

"Not really."

I didn't believe him but I let it go, for now.

Joe and I left the office and went back to my apartment.

"I am going to leave you here and I will be back to pick you up at five."

"Where are we going then?"

"Out."

"Define out."

"Wear something tight and sexy, but something that you can dance in as well."

Fantastic, dancing was not really my thing. I had no idea what to do. I know that you are supposed to let the man lead and you follow, but I had not even a clue how to follow.

"Lula, its Steph." What can I say, I'm despite.

"Hey girl, hey. What can Lula do for you?"

"Can you come over, I need help getting ready for tonight."

"Well I was going to do some filing, but I file every other day, my hands need a break. I will be there in ten."

I don't believe Lula has actually filed once since she started. But I figured she could teach me how to dance and then we could hit Macy's in search of a dress and some new FMP's.

"You mean to tell me your skinny white girl ass doesn't know how to get its groove on?"

"Nope."

"I am sure you had to dance sometime."

"Nope not really."

"What about at your wedding?"

"The point is…I need to impress Ranger tonight, so I need help."

Lula scurried around to the stereo and put on some hip-hop music she dubbed as clubbing music.

"Okay basically you are takin your man on the floor. You need to be all up and on him and it has to be hot."

"But what do I do?"

"You just rub yourself up on him, but do it to the music."

"Do I face him or away from him?"

"Both mix it up. If you face him people think you are really serious. And don't you think I am about to show you what I mean. Lula only does that on special occasions."

We got in the car and Lula told me all about how to make it look convincing. I am supposed to be all sweaty and move like all sexually. So basically it is sex without the clothes on. I think I can do that.

"Good thing we are doing Macy's because I need me some new shoes."

"Didn't you just get some yesterday?"

"Yeah but, I saw another pair I liked and I need those too."

We went to shoes first, good thing too because I found the best cherry red FMP's that were only slightly out of my price range. Lula on the other hand had three pairs of FMP's and two pair of sandals.

"Damn skippy, today is my day. Look at all of this hotness, and its on sale."

Only Lula would find a pair of zebra print FMP's and think they were the shit. Nonetheless I was having a good shopping day as well. I got a very small black dress to go with my red shoes. I figured I could do with some new panties while I was here anyway. So we took of to Victoria Secret. I with my two bags Lula with her seven.

"How do you have room for all of your shoes?"

"Well I have started to let some sleep in the pantry with the food. My two favorite things should be together right."

Macy's might be Lula's place, but Victoria Secret was defiantly mine. Which in point of fact made little sense but I did end up with three sets, one red, one black, and one see through. What can I say, it makes me feel sexy and god only knows I will need that tonight.

"All this shopping could give a girl an appetite." Lula said as we were passing Chick-Fil-A.

We were sitting there eating out chicken when Lula got that look on her face. The look meant either there was a sign saying free donuts or some really hot man was behind us.

I turned around to see Tank approaching us.

"Hey big boy, what brings you to the motherland?"

"Motherland?" we both asked.

"Shopping, Food, and Hot Men…" that is my idea of a motherland.

I decided to just focus on Tank.

"Hey Steph, I told Joe about the take down tonight at Roma and got you in. Here is the problem however Roma is not a place you go alone so Ranger has a date as well. He has no idea you are going but I thought I would warn you ahead of time."

"Thanks tank, I think I can handle it."

"Great, here is the other problem." Tank said addressing Lula. "I am going with Ranger tonight and I need a date. I was hoping that you would be free to accompany me."

"Damn Skippy. I was going to spend some time watching The Rock tonight, but you are hotter, so hell yeah. Does Lula get to get her groove on?"

"Yes we will have to do some dancing." Tank said looking quite thrilled actually.

"You had better be prepared Big Boy."

"Oh I am." He said as he walked away.

Oh man, this was going to be a crazy night, Ranger with his date, Tank and Lula, and Joe and I.

At five Joe let himself in and I told him I would be ready in ten. At 5:45 Joe was getting really impatient.

"Good thing I knew this would happen and I made the reservations for six."

I spend 30 minutes doing my makeup and it looked perfect, my hair was blown out to a wavy state, I was in my dress and my FMP's were secured on my feet. I was looking good.

"Cupcake, you really do clean up well. You are lucky I have some sort of self control because broken up or not there are things I would do to you."

"Lets go Joe."

By nine Roma's had transformed from a classy dining establishment to a crowded night club. Joe and I were sitting at a quaint table right on the edge of the dance floor.

"Joe, I do not have a clue in hell how to dance to this kind of music."

"Cupcake, I am sure you will be fantastic, do the things you did to me in bed. Just keep all of your clothes on."

"Did I tell you Lula is going to be here with Tank?"

Joe let out a full bodied laugh. "That is something I would pay to see."

"You won't have to wait much longer because here they are."

Lula a size 18 squished into a size 8 dress. She had cleavage so deep people might be in there and she would never know. Her dress was white and she was wearing the zebra print shoes she bought that afternoon. Once she spotted us she grabbed Tank's hand and hauled him off towards us.

"I do not see anyone glistening, why no dancing?"

"We were waiting for you."

Tank shook Joe's hand and gave me a kiss on the cheek to say hello. He looked excited to be at this job as opposed to his usual no emotion showing face.

"I have a bit of bad news." Tank told us.

"Ranger is still coming right?" I asked eagerly.

"Yes he will be coming. Tonight they are playing Spanish music."

"Good thing Lula can dance to everything." Lula said confidently.

Tank shot her a smile.

"What is the problem with that?" Joe asked.

"Well to fit in here Ranger and I have to look like we are actually here for fun, so Ranger is going to be on the dance floor and with Spanish music Ranger is the shit."

"Meaning I just cannot look at him. I will be fine."

"Alright, but I warned you." Tank said.

"Lets get our grooves on." Lula said as she dragged Tank onto the dance floor.

Joe stood up and pulled out my chair and gave me a kiss on the ear. We followed Lula and Tank to a spot near the middle.

I watched as Tank grabbed Lula around her waist, and with his big arms her waist looked a lot smaller than it really was. They both found the beat and started getting into it. Lula was faced away from Tank pressing herself into him while swinging her hips. This was going to be bad news for me.

"Cupcake it is a lot easier than it looks. Start by just looking at me and follow where I move you."

The first song ended and I was feeling much more comfortable. The music was loud and people were not focused on me and I was focused on Joe and no one else. Well okay occasionally I stole a look at Tank and Lula.

The next song was faster and with stronger beat. I felt confident, this really was just like sex, except easier.

I turned away from Joe and he put his arms around my waist and I rested mine on his. We clenched our hands together in some kind of handholding while dancing situation. I grinded into him and leaned my head back. He had his mouth on my neck and was moaning slightly.

"This is all for Ranger." I kept telling myself.

By the fourth song I was really enjoying myself. It was hot and my dress was up higher than it started. Tank and Lula were now grinding while facing each other. I am pretty sure I saw them kissing at one point, but I am not totally sure. But so far Ranger was no where to be seen.

When that song ended Joe and I left Tank and Lula to their dancing. I really needed to cool down, and to get my dress down from around my waist. And I thought no one would see the new panties I bought.

"Damn cupcake, you really are a quick learning."

"Not bad yourself Joseph." I said and gave him a quick kiss.

At the end of the next song Lula and Tank came out of the crowd looking hotter than normal. I would admit they would make a nice looking couple. Tank offsets Lula, maybe the only man in this would that could actually take the attention off of her.

Tank guided Lula towards the back, probably to get in mode for the capture. As they walked by Lula gave me her signature "get it girl" look.

The music switched to a more sensual Latin beat. This time I was the one who wanted to dance. Not just to impress Ranger, but it was fun.

As I stood I felt that presence behind me, I knew Ranger had seen me, I could feel it. So I did what any good Burg raised girl would do….I swung my hips twice as much as I usually do. I kissed Joe hard and deep and we strutted back to the dance floor.

This time I was not scared, I just became one with the beat, as corny as that sounds. I moved Joe behind me and together we moved with the music. It was hotter than anything I had done in my life. Maybe it was the fact that I had an audience, or maybe it was that I had a bit much to drink, or maybe I was just enjoying myself. The beat suddenly quickened and we quickened with it.

Joe tilted my head back and kissed me. I was really making out on the dance floor. That sounded like something Lula would do, but not me. I turned to face Joe when I saw Ranger being led to the dance floor by one of the most stunning women I have ever seen. She was my height with tan skin long blond hair and was perfectly shaped. Moments later Lula and Tank returned to the floor.

I decided it would do me more good to busy myself with Joe's mouth that watching Ranger.

After the song ended Tank and Lula scooted closer.

"You remember how I told you Ranger was a good dancer?" Tank asked me.

I nodded.

"Well you are about to see that. They are playing a set of Bachata's next."

Joe, Lula, and I all looked at each other in confusion. "A what?"

"It is a very sexual and romantic dance, something that Ranger is amazing at. I thought I would tell you because all eyes are about to be on them."

Great.

"I bet I could dance a BachiBai too." Lula said.

"BA-CHA-TA." Tank corrected.

"Yeah that. I bet I could do it better than Ranger."

The music changed again to what I could only guess what Bachata music. Tank was whispering something to Joe and Lula was busy dancing with herself.

Joe held me as we swayed and watched Ranger. He really was magical. It was like he was floating on air. His hair was down, still black on black, but it was sexy. He twirled his date into him and she grinded on his leg and she would twirl behind his back. It was some crazy insane dance. It was very sensual and smooth, the connection between the two was like they were one. She would back up and he would follow, she would spin he would spin. It looked difficult.

"Cupcake, Tank is going to dance this one with you, he knows the moves and I don't. We want Rangers attention on you, not your attention on him."

There was no way that I could do that. Were they serious, even if I did have that connection with Tank I am not graceful.

"You are actually quite graceful on the dance floor, Lula and I watched you. Plus you do not need that connection, just look in my eyes and you will make people think you have it. That is what Ranger is doing. Start off my standing a few feet away from me and just look. Then strut around me, like I am yours. Throw in a spin or two for fun. Then I will come to you and then it is easy, just start following me. "

Tank got into position as the next song started, I stood a few feet away as Tank instructed. I knew Rangers eyes were on me, actually the whole crowd was watching. I was not going to panic though; I was too drunk to panic. When the beat picked up I strutted right up to Tank and saw the confusion in his eyes. I brushed my hand across his face and did a twirl; I let the music move me as I shimmied to the other side. I did the "I want you" look and then walked away to where I started. Tank stared at me as he walked all the way around me and grabbed my hand. Suddenly the music picked up and before I knew what I was doing we were spinning across the floor. My knee was locked inside of his. He stopped with me in front of him holding my left hand slightly above. We were swaying back and forth, me rubbing up against him. I decided to be brave and I moved like I spun to face him and stepped back just like what Rangers girl did. Tank followed me staring right into my eyes like I was drawing him back. We then moved into a sidestep action with a grind at the end, and then back to spinning.

I was spinning across the floor just like when Belle and the Beast were when they were in the ballroom. Before I knew it there was a new person in the place of Tank…Ranger.

We came to a stop and he looked into my eyes. I circled him like I did with Tank, except with more enthusiasm, more desire. I moved toward him, slowly with the music. My hand raised to his chin and brushed across his cheek. In a flowing movement he pulled me into him and we grinded face to face, my hands were tangled in his hair and our faces were all but touching. Then again he spun me away from him and I rubbing against him.

I figured I already screwed myself over so why not go out with a bang.

As I grinded against him he held my arms over my head and I lowered myself down to one knee and then back up pushing my ass against him. I knew he was enjoying the feeling. I spun back toward him and again lowered myself, all while staring in his eyes. God did I want that man.

I stepped away to end just like I began and as I came closer to circle around him he put one hand behind my neck and the other around my waist and dipped me.

"I know what you're doing." Ranger whispered.

_**BAHAHAHAHAHAHA THE END OF THE CHAPTER!! Okay so the Bachata is not really what I described. It is in a way but not totally. I thought I would clarify right now. This was a really really really long chapter for me so yay me.**_

_**Please Review. I do not update without them. I like to know people think I should actually go on!**_


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